The Wildebeest Principle

image stolen from natgeo.com

Humans do not crave happiness as the greatest goal, it is there at the top but not over everything else. What they really crave for is drama, a bittersweet drama. Humans crave a memory that has all the elements which they can remember fondly when the dust has settled. This is why people marry or at least feel intense pangs of sadness for not being married, it happens even to the best of us and anyone who says otherwise is lying. The dreams of having memory of a happy married life is probably the greatest opium ever for men. The drug of a happy ending is the greatest drug of them all and for men it inevitable falls to him getting his muse (girls for most part). So for all the drug addicts here is the cheat code that will put you above the competition (99% of people who have not read this and 99.9% of those who have read this).

Ahab and the Tobacco Harpoon

image stolen from poptastes.com

Was smoking cigarette in a semi-public place. As expected the demon weed brought a sniffing hound in the form of an obese girl in early twenties who would look attractive to a paraplegic binge porn watcher under effect of sorcery level hallucinogen. This girl tried to purge me of my sins of smoking extortionately taxed tobacco, she waved her finger, told me about the perils of smoking, let me bathe in her aura of moral and civic superiority, and finally let the horror sink in that I, a lowly pleb, had fouled the air breathed by her.

Reckless Girls

image stolen from popmatters.com

Disclaimer: I hate stories where you have to click 20 times to watch 20 photos. For the purpose of this post only the first photo suffices.

Was surfing through net and found this story. Aside from being the last photo of the deceased, it is also an ode to that unique quality of humans that will forever separate us from machines—Stupidity. It is a collection of regular people doing mind boggingly stupid acts for/while taking their last selfie. Some of the acts listed are so stupidly retarded that the story has to be real. The story is also female dominated with the fairer sex putting to question the wisdom of granting them the vote and boy do they make a strong case for repeal of voting laws.

Don't get me wrong this is not a post complaining about the sheer incompetence and looniness that surrounds us, I am a fine specimen of incompetence and buffoonery and am miserably aware of that. I have eloped before exams to fornicate with moderately attractive girls all the while sure that the test exam will be postponed due to sheer power of my imagination or a huge meteor strike, so I am not unfamiliar with the dark arts of idiocy. No, this post is deeper than that. You see, what got me interested was the way the first girl died. The Russian chick took a selfie while being suspended high above the ground on a narrow pole, a fucking pole.